When I was young, I used to imagine how much I would've achieved and learnt at the age of 24 because that's when my mom had me. Little did I know that quarter life crisis would hit me so badly.
I have nothing figured out - not a bunch of savings to buy my own apartment and I see making my bed, having a clean desk and doing my laundry as "milestones" of life...On top of that, the biggest questions are "should I wash my hair today" and "what should I eat for the next meal".
Despite all of these, I feel that I do have some lessons that I learn which are worth sharing.
1. I should start treating my body like a temple and not the way I used to treat it at 15 years old.
I can no longer deal with late nights as the sleep debts get really bad and I'd fall sick rather easily. Exercising becomes something that can't be skipped - not even for a few days as I can actually feel the condition of the body going downhill in me.
2. Time management is way more important than people give it credit for.
When I was younger, I felt that I could easily do 1000 things at the same time - guitar, blogging, full time school, ballet, tuition classes, hanging out with friends, Korean dramas and etc...As an adult *ahem*, I need to to keep an old school diary to map things out ahead of time to schedule my tasks, yet I find them challenging as well because usually when I come back from work, all I want to do is just shower and crash on my bed. Time just slips by so quickly when you are chilling out while scrolling through social media apps on the phone. At hindsight, maybe I could do everything because I had shitty Internet and a lame phone so I had no other ways but turned to my hobbies. So, at the end of the day it comes down to willpower and that has nothing to do with the external circumstances.
3. There's good in everything, even in the bad.
When my favourite Youtuber Kalyn Nicholson said that, I had a little trouble in digesting the meaning of that statement. Now that so many things had happened in the past few months, I finally got it. Things happened for a reason, even when you might not be able to understand it when you were deep in that mud swamp, I promise you, things will get better as time heals *cliche as F, I know* but that is so true. Looking back, I now know that the Law of Attraction IS REAL! If it wasn't for the fact that I hit my all time low in my life, I wouldn't have taken the time off and really let my emotions sink in and try to get to know myself a little bit better and re-route my path in chasing my dreams.
4. Never give up on the things that you really enjoy.
I love writing which is why I started blogging at 14 years old. I love my guitars too. I love reading. Unfortunately, as my life was being taken over by work (note point #2) and I lost my motivation to get things done, I stopped doing them. It wasn't until a few months ago when I started to feel insanely stressful and anxious, my best friend told me, "you should get back to what truly makes you happy which you used to pursue not for anything else but your happiness". These little things might not seem really significant but as we grow, there is a tendency for us to put more things onto the priority list depending on what's the worth of return those things will bring us.
5. Go out there and explore.
I was never a travel bug, until I went to Korea on my own. To be honest, it's not about the "Oh I am here and let's take a selfie" kind of thing but truly just getting out there, going through your bottled emotions and thoughts and learning new things and meeting new people. It's very humbling because you will realise that you yourself and your problems are not as much as a big deal as you thought they were because nobody knows who the F are you let alone giving a shit about you. The thing is to go there and live in the present, even you are taking it as a getaway from your problems, I promise it's worth it and you will feel the change of perspective.
6. Suede leather is a shitty investment.
It takes too much hardwork to maintain, don't go for them.
7. Save up money as much as you can.
I am talking about this because I don't come from a wealthy family. I know how hard my mom had worked her ass off to send me overseas for my studies and thus I never had the luxury to squander money and go on endless brunch dates and roadtrips with my friends. Luckily I never felt "life's unfair" as I am someone who appreciates my own time at home and doing my own things, so it's not a problem. Your savings will help bring you closer to a goal that you truly want to achieve. Money doesn't guarantee happiness but no matter you like this saying or not, it does give you more freedom to have more options. Without my savings, I wouldn't have been able to go to Korea, make an impulsive trip to Hong Kong for just 36 hours to watch Yong Hwa oppa's concert, to start my own business, to be not afraid of not having a stable job for a while in the chase of my own entrepreneur dream...I used to think that by the age of 24, I'd want to splurge on a Balenciaga motorcycle handbag but now I just want to save up the money and use it when there's something that would make me say "I can't live without it". That's when you know you have spent your money in a worthwhile manner. The rest is just vanity. Of course, I'm not telling you to be super calculative and get mad over that 50 cents which you paid extra for your friend's meal. It's all about having the right balance ;)
8. Don't regret, take it as a lesson learnt and a leap of faith which you had wanted.
I don't regret falling for the wrong person - if I could rewind the time, I'm pretty sure I'd make the same decision, because without that pain that he put me through back then, I wouldn't be who I am right now. I don't regret for undergoing laser procedures on my birth mark which resulted in a scar on my face because that was the very first leap of faith of my entire life. Plus, I truthfully believe that if I were to go to Korea to fix my skin today, it can be done.
9. When you dreams/desire scare you so much, remember that it's an indication of you-have-to-go-for-it. It's God's way of testing out how much faith you have in yourself.
10. Drink your coffee with a straw.
It looks stupid but your teeth will thank you for it.
11. Get a real camera.
As good as smart phone cameras can be, nothing beats a good camera or even a vintage polaroid camera.
12. Live in the present.
We tend to worry too much about the future (yes, I am effing guilty for that), putting things off till that tomorrow that never comes and not spending the time with the ones we love. Tangible things don't last forever, let alone living things. You know what I am implying...
13. If someone takes you for granted, rip them off like a band-aid - it will hurt at first, but it's worthwhile.
I used to have a friend who I'd move mountains for her but she was never there for me. Even when we were sitting side by side to one another and I asked her opinion on something that I was designing, she'd tell me "I'm busy texting my boyfriend". If someone treats you like shit, throw them out. Life is hard enough with challenges to overcome, you don't need someone else blocking the orbit. Relate to point #8 as well.
14. Seek help if you need.
Don't think you can conquer the world on your own. Even the greatest commander needs an army of his own so reach out to people. Most importantly cherish your crew.
15. Mom's the person who showers you with the most love, even though she might not do it in the right way at times.
It's annoying but it's just because she's acting from a position of "I'm Your Mom" (this can't be any further from the truth typically for Asian moms) instead of your best friend. If you believe in your dreams and goals, a little rebellion is needed, at times - it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission, but you need to prove yourself for being worthwhile of your mom's faith in you.
16. It's okay to not give a fuck about what people think of you.
People gossip behind my back during my university days about how much of a Korean wannabe I was (still am #sorrynotsorry) and not being proud of my own country. Who the fuck told you there's a need to gossip because that's a downright fact which I never even try to hide. Everything is better on the side of Kimchiland (maybe just not Android phones). Especially when you could speak pure Korean in Kimchiland #hatersgonnahate!Be unapologetically yourself - the prerequisite condition is that you don't hurt people along the way.
17. Get that tattoo/piercing that you have always wanted because it doesn't affect your nature.
Sorry Asian parents for this but it's the way your kid(s) was brought up and the life experience that they go through which shape them for who they are, not a mere tattoo or piercing...I have 6 piercings, that's relatively many for Asians but I'm still who I am.
18. Facials, hair removal lasers, manicures and pedicures are a good investment for self-pampering.
19. Don't be stingy with that little bit of money because sometimes the opportunity cost would be much greater.
When I was switching from an iPhone 4S to an iPhone 6, I bought the cheapest iPhone 6 with the smallest storage. That's the stupidest idea for not spending another 200 dollars for more storage and I regretted it for the next 2.5 years. How did I pass Economics back then?!
20. Meditating, being grateful and believing in yourself and the Law of Attraction will bring magic into your life.
You don't pay a single penny for having faith.
21. Cook your own meals.
It's cheaper, it's healthier, it's fun and makes you look a lot more talented than you thought.
22. There's no point in cherishing a book if you don't enjoy the read and truly learn something from it.
I used to take so much good care of my new book that I wouldn't dare to open it for an inch wider with the fear that I may leave a folding mark by its spine. I was paying more attention in being cautious than truly immersing myself in the book. Right now, I have no problem in highlighting the meaningful things that I learn from a book and making notes inside because it's a shame to only appreciate something half-heartedly.
23. I'm thankful for having overly thick eyebrows.
I used to think my eyebrows looked like caterpillars when I was younger and hated them. Little did I know it would save me heaps of trouble from having to fill in my brows after 15 years.
24. You will never be ready.
If you sit around waiting for yourself to be ready, you'd be starved to death by now. The current business that I recently launched is the only one that didn't come with a full-on business plan - the rest was just nice on paper and nothing else. Get down and dirty is the only way in achieving what you want. You may do stupid mistakes and have no idea where you are headed but anything is better than being stagnant at one spot. One day you'd look back and tell yourself, "Look at how far I've come".
.
.
Although I am no where near to having things all sorted out and I still in desperate need with an "Adulting 101 Handbook". At the end of the day, I finally know that there is no way someone will have everything figured out and that's how life is. There is always something to be uncomfortable about, something that catches you off guard and throw your life into a turmoil but you just keep pushing through with more stamina than the previously.
Just my 2 cents ;) And here's to 2 dozen years old.
I have nothing figured out - not a bunch of savings to buy my own apartment and I see making my bed, having a clean desk and doing my laundry as "milestones" of life...On top of that, the biggest questions are "should I wash my hair today" and "what should I eat for the next meal".
Despite all of these, I feel that I do have some lessons that I learn which are worth sharing.
1. I should start treating my body like a temple and not the way I used to treat it at 15 years old.
I can no longer deal with late nights as the sleep debts get really bad and I'd fall sick rather easily. Exercising becomes something that can't be skipped - not even for a few days as I can actually feel the condition of the body going downhill in me.
2. Time management is way more important than people give it credit for.
When I was younger, I felt that I could easily do 1000 things at the same time - guitar, blogging, full time school, ballet, tuition classes, hanging out with friends, Korean dramas and etc...As an adult *ahem*, I need to to keep an old school diary to map things out ahead of time to schedule my tasks, yet I find them challenging as well because usually when I come back from work, all I want to do is just shower and crash on my bed. Time just slips by so quickly when you are chilling out while scrolling through social media apps on the phone. At hindsight, maybe I could do everything because I had shitty Internet and a lame phone so I had no other ways but turned to my hobbies. So, at the end of the day it comes down to willpower and that has nothing to do with the external circumstances.
3. There's good in everything, even in the bad.
When my favourite Youtuber Kalyn Nicholson said that, I had a little trouble in digesting the meaning of that statement. Now that so many things had happened in the past few months, I finally got it. Things happened for a reason, even when you might not be able to understand it when you were deep in that mud swamp, I promise you, things will get better as time heals *cliche as F, I know* but that is so true. Looking back, I now know that the Law of Attraction IS REAL! If it wasn't for the fact that I hit my all time low in my life, I wouldn't have taken the time off and really let my emotions sink in and try to get to know myself a little bit better and re-route my path in chasing my dreams.
4. Never give up on the things that you really enjoy.
I love writing which is why I started blogging at 14 years old. I love my guitars too. I love reading. Unfortunately, as my life was being taken over by work (note point #2) and I lost my motivation to get things done, I stopped doing them. It wasn't until a few months ago when I started to feel insanely stressful and anxious, my best friend told me, "you should get back to what truly makes you happy which you used to pursue not for anything else but your happiness". These little things might not seem really significant but as we grow, there is a tendency for us to put more things onto the priority list depending on what's the worth of return those things will bring us.
5. Go out there and explore.
I was never a travel bug, until I went to Korea on my own. To be honest, it's not about the "Oh I am here and let's take a selfie" kind of thing but truly just getting out there, going through your bottled emotions and thoughts and learning new things and meeting new people. It's very humbling because you will realise that you yourself and your problems are not as much as a big deal as you thought they were because nobody knows who the F are you let alone giving a shit about you. The thing is to go there and live in the present, even you are taking it as a getaway from your problems, I promise it's worth it and you will feel the change of perspective.
6. Suede leather is a shitty investment.
It takes too much hardwork to maintain, don't go for them.
7. Save up money as much as you can.
I am talking about this because I don't come from a wealthy family. I know how hard my mom had worked her ass off to send me overseas for my studies and thus I never had the luxury to squander money and go on endless brunch dates and roadtrips with my friends. Luckily I never felt "life's unfair" as I am someone who appreciates my own time at home and doing my own things, so it's not a problem. Your savings will help bring you closer to a goal that you truly want to achieve. Money doesn't guarantee happiness but no matter you like this saying or not, it does give you more freedom to have more options. Without my savings, I wouldn't have been able to go to Korea, make an impulsive trip to Hong Kong for just 36 hours to watch Yong Hwa oppa's concert, to start my own business, to be not afraid of not having a stable job for a while in the chase of my own entrepreneur dream...I used to think that by the age of 24, I'd want to splurge on a Balenciaga motorcycle handbag but now I just want to save up the money and use it when there's something that would make me say "I can't live without it". That's when you know you have spent your money in a worthwhile manner. The rest is just vanity. Of course, I'm not telling you to be super calculative and get mad over that 50 cents which you paid extra for your friend's meal. It's all about having the right balance ;)
8. Don't regret, take it as a lesson learnt and a leap of faith which you had wanted.
I don't regret falling for the wrong person - if I could rewind the time, I'm pretty sure I'd make the same decision, because without that pain that he put me through back then, I wouldn't be who I am right now. I don't regret for undergoing laser procedures on my birth mark which resulted in a scar on my face because that was the very first leap of faith of my entire life. Plus, I truthfully believe that if I were to go to Korea to fix my skin today, it can be done.
9. When you dreams/desire scare you so much, remember that it's an indication of you-have-to-go-for-it. It's God's way of testing out how much faith you have in yourself.
10. Drink your coffee with a straw.
It looks stupid but your teeth will thank you for it.
11. Get a real camera.
As good as smart phone cameras can be, nothing beats a good camera or even a vintage polaroid camera.
12. Live in the present.
We tend to worry too much about the future (yes, I am effing guilty for that), putting things off till that tomorrow that never comes and not spending the time with the ones we love. Tangible things don't last forever, let alone living things. You know what I am implying...
13. If someone takes you for granted, rip them off like a band-aid - it will hurt at first, but it's worthwhile.
I used to have a friend who I'd move mountains for her but she was never there for me. Even when we were sitting side by side to one another and I asked her opinion on something that I was designing, she'd tell me "I'm busy texting my boyfriend". If someone treats you like shit, throw them out. Life is hard enough with challenges to overcome, you don't need someone else blocking the orbit. Relate to point #8 as well.
14. Seek help if you need.
Don't think you can conquer the world on your own. Even the greatest commander needs an army of his own so reach out to people. Most importantly cherish your crew.
15. Mom's the person who showers you with the most love, even though she might not do it in the right way at times.
It's annoying but it's just because she's acting from a position of "I'm Your Mom" (this can't be any further from the truth typically for Asian moms) instead of your best friend. If you believe in your dreams and goals, a little rebellion is needed, at times - it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission, but you need to prove yourself for being worthwhile of your mom's faith in you.
16. It's okay to not give a fuck about what people think of you.
People gossip behind my back during my university days about how much of a Korean wannabe I was (still am #sorrynotsorry) and not being proud of my own country. Who the fuck told you there's a need to gossip because that's a downright fact which I never even try to hide. Everything is better on the side of Kimchiland (maybe just not Android phones). Especially when you could speak pure Korean in Kimchiland #hatersgonnahate!Be unapologetically yourself - the prerequisite condition is that you don't hurt people along the way.
17. Get that tattoo/piercing that you have always wanted because it doesn't affect your nature.
Sorry Asian parents for this but it's the way your kid(s) was brought up and the life experience that they go through which shape them for who they are, not a mere tattoo or piercing...I have 6 piercings, that's relatively many for Asians but I'm still who I am.
18. Facials, hair removal lasers, manicures and pedicures are a good investment for self-pampering.
19. Don't be stingy with that little bit of money because sometimes the opportunity cost would be much greater.
When I was switching from an iPhone 4S to an iPhone 6, I bought the cheapest iPhone 6 with the smallest storage. That's the stupidest idea for not spending another 200 dollars for more storage and I regretted it for the next 2.5 years. How did I pass Economics back then?!
20. Meditating, being grateful and believing in yourself and the Law of Attraction will bring magic into your life.
You don't pay a single penny for having faith.
21. Cook your own meals.
It's cheaper, it's healthier, it's fun and makes you look a lot more talented than you thought.
22. There's no point in cherishing a book if you don't enjoy the read and truly learn something from it.
I used to take so much good care of my new book that I wouldn't dare to open it for an inch wider with the fear that I may leave a folding mark by its spine. I was paying more attention in being cautious than truly immersing myself in the book. Right now, I have no problem in highlighting the meaningful things that I learn from a book and making notes inside because it's a shame to only appreciate something half-heartedly.
23. I'm thankful for having overly thick eyebrows.
I used to think my eyebrows looked like caterpillars when I was younger and hated them. Little did I know it would save me heaps of trouble from having to fill in my brows after 15 years.
24. You will never be ready.
If you sit around waiting for yourself to be ready, you'd be starved to death by now. The current business that I recently launched is the only one that didn't come with a full-on business plan - the rest was just nice on paper and nothing else. Get down and dirty is the only way in achieving what you want. You may do stupid mistakes and have no idea where you are headed but anything is better than being stagnant at one spot. One day you'd look back and tell yourself, "Look at how far I've come".
.
.
Although I am no where near to having things all sorted out and I still in desperate need with an "Adulting 101 Handbook". At the end of the day, I finally know that there is no way someone will have everything figured out and that's how life is. There is always something to be uncomfortable about, something that catches you off guard and throw your life into a turmoil but you just keep pushing through with more stamina than the previously.
Just my 2 cents ;) And here's to 2 dozen years old.
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